a Young Adult Topic

4 Dec

Something that’s always been pretty confusing for me is my Menstrual Cycle.

Now, I know, I know. Ew. Right? But bare with me. This is an important topic, not only for the budding woman, but for the discerning gentlemen.

For example, I used to “date” this guy when I lived at college, who lived at another college. It was pretty chill because I could go visit him and “hit home runs” without anybody knowing that I was cheating on my bf. Anyway.

While visiting him, I once had my Period. He was very understanding and brought me tea from the dining hall and we spent the whole weekend reading Calvin and Hobbes in his bed. And because of this he received many BJs, as the direct result of being up-to-speed on his Menstruation Education.

Some Common Misconceptions about Menstruation

1) Menstruation means that you or your lady friend is “bleeding out of your/her vagina.”

2) Men also have menstrual cycles. This is something that my roommate Niko told me, because he was feeling left out from my special monthly time. Totally normal. But false.

3) The band “The Cramps” is a feminist, female-only punk band ala The Cunt Rags. This is something that I thought until very recently, so I would rate this misconception as highly common. However the lead singer died recently and it was a boy. Just one more example of how sometimes it’s better to be seen not heard when it comes to potentially embarrassing yourself.

Please feel free to comment below with any questions you feel nervous about asking your parents\T-ball coach\trusted adult.


3 Responses to “a Young Adult Topic”

  1. Nathanael Totushek December 4, 2009 at 6:37 pm #

    Is it already the fourth? Oh shoot. Have to take my Male Menstruation Pill (also known as AKA ‘MMP, also AKA ‘The Manstruator’). Perhaps this is what Niko meant. It’s a cheap simulation, we’ll admit, but for lack of better empathy-generating rituals, or a participant ‘lady friend’ by which to set the empathetic clock of dude psyche, a little dose of progesterone seems to kick things off right around rent time. In a purely non-scientific, completely symbolic, astral, what-have-you, kind of sense, it’s a great way at least to practice androgyny, if that is anyone’s idea of a good time.
    Does Judy Blume have a stance on making guys take the pill instead of castrating them outright?

  2. pony December 9, 2009 at 1:25 pm #

    Thank you for clearing all that up. Thank you for Judy Blume.

  3. dobbinses December 18, 2009 at 1:40 pm #

    as someone who is fond of the term “bleeding out the [insert your favorite synonym for vagina],” i’d like to know exactly what is misconceived about this. I may end up agreeing with you, but i’ll still use my favorite crude phrase when your having your special-time. Personally, I’ve decided on amenorrhea.

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