Tag Archives: Barbie as ESL teacher

Not Job=Nut Job: a post that is not about squirrels

27 May

Who has seen Reality Bites? It is a true documentary about the youth of our times and their post-coll’y struggles. And right now, guys, it is about me and my life. I am like desolate. Overeducated and underemployed, you know? The recession. Tea parties. Obama-rama.

For awhile I was like, I will just blog my way into getting a job. And then I was like, I am bored of this blog. And THEN I was like, I should blog about that.

So here is what we are learning Horse Facts about today: What should I do for a job now that there aren’t really any jobs? I did a quick search of Google to determine the career paths available to me, as modeled by Barbie because I have a hard time paying attention if there are unattractive people\dolls involved:

From top right: Ginger haired college grad; 70s Quaaludes mom; space cowgirl; SARS victim; Olympic something; Cyndi Lauper impersonator; terrorist; McDonald’s employee\Michael Jackson reference??

According to Wikipedia, Barbie has also been a Spanish teacher, a paleontologist, and an Ambassador for World Peace. Discussion topic: Do you ever think that Barbie got some of these jobs unfairly, because she conforms to\is often credited for creating our society’s stereotypes re: gender\unrealistic height-weight proportions\perky attitude?

Here is me modeling the last real job I had, which was baking things while ignoring a lot of different health codes regarding grooming:

Wups, I feel like this is getting off-top. I looked on YouTubes for a version of the Offspring’s coming-of-age anthem about this, but they’ve disabled the “embed” feature. Luckily this Japanese cover uncannily captures the spirit, if not the actual lyrics: